notebook spirals

you were an autumn leaf in a pile that children play in,
but the wind brought you to me.
it was then i realized you weren't just a leaf, but my leaf
that would fit perfectly in my scrapbook of memories.

if i press you in the pages of my favorite book
will you mark the story of our lives?
i should've known the universe would cross our paths and dot our eyes
you opened the door for my heart and my heart is now smiling

our chemistry was like the sparks at a bonfire
and our electric fingers were the bumper cars of the amusement park
we're on the same page, same word
you be the vowel, i'll be the constanant

i'll be the notebook spirals to your diary and hold you together
if you'll be my flashlight when i hide under the covers
our record player is stuck on repeat
and we become the repeat sign on a musical staff

i'd pick you a flower from my garden of forever
but this garden is only made up of "he loves me" petals
splash your rainboots in the puddles of tomorrow
the weatherman can only predict what yesterday told him

lets break the hands of a clock to spend forever with each other
and moments will only be counted in gazes and whispers
our swing sets face the sunset colors against the canvas of tomorrow's promise
let's race to the ocean and be too afraid to jump in

the ink drops of our pen are mad at the hands of our love
they couldn't find words beautiful enough to express themselves
those three words cannot be expressed in enough languages
let's translate every version we can find and let our hearts memorize

this roller coaster make-believe fairytale lovestory of a ride won't ever end
our hearts may stop and our words might fail us
and they'll have to redefine the word genuine
because the world didn't know what it was until we met

through our rain-stained coffeshop window
the world just waits and watches
and we'll eat our cherriless sundaes and smile at the world
and only we'll know why


by amandalee.

a poem brought to you by a younger amandalee

I never realized how short a day was 'til I was with you,
never realized how long a day was 'til I was without you.
Your presence changes the beat of the earth,
your warmth changes the beat of my heart.
Your sweet words are the lyrics,
your breath on my neck is the melody.
Your absence stops me in my tracks
and makes north feel like south,
but the compass in my heart
will always and only point to you.

rather than then

Why does the universe have to be so unfair sometimes?
If I'm a kid then the universe is a bully with a shaking fist.
Today I have my own personal raincloud of a kite.
Everyone makes reference to their life being like a song.
Maybe that's why we have to hear so many bad songs before we finally find one worth listening to.
A beautiful person once said, "Lovesongs try and lovesongs fail. But you and I are quite literally forever and every song out there eventually has to end."
Well my song is currently filled with broken staccato notes; they replaced the beautifully tied notes that once made up the soundtrack of my life.
Funny thing about sacrifices is that you have to lose something first in order to gain what it is that you want later on, down the road.
I wish the universe had loophole I could jump into and make things right, now, rather than then.
There's a lot of things I'd rather have happen than have to make a sacrifice.
But the universe is a bully. And I'm just a child.

My contribution to thecolorme

check out eitherly.blogspot.com if you enjoyed this. this is what i had to share.


"Love makes the world go round."
That saying is so cheesy. Not just cheesy-cheesy but nacho-cheesy, which is way worse. But being who I am now, and what surrounds me, I realize how completely true this is, especially when it comes to my life. Love. It's such a beautiful thing, I just don't know how anyone could go through life not searching for it.

I don't really see how people could question what the purpose of life was. Philosophers come up with their theories which are good, religious leaders promote their ideas which are good, but I've always been the "cinderella-snow-white-fairytale-love-is-true-i-believe-in-happily-ever-afters" type of person. I've always wanted true love, I've wanted the nacho-cheesy story of two strangers meeting by chance. I don't see how there can be anything else worth striving for.

Luckily, I've found my Prince Charming, and not the one from Shrek... this one's a keeper. I could tell you our story and how we met and how we fell in love and how now we're going to ride off into the sunshine now but riding off is never where the story ends.
That's what bugs me about movies. You watch Cinderella have a rough life and you want more for her. Then you see her get a break and meet her Prince Charming. Obviously they wouldn't make movies about an average person who has an average life and meets an average man in a typical way and they live a typical life. No one wants to watch that. We want to see Cinderella and
Prince Charming make out, fall in love, lose her shoe and dance at the ball. Oh wait... they didn't make out. Child's movie. But you know they totally would if they could. We all want to have a life worth making a movie out of. Oh, right.. the point I was getting to. Sorry. My bad.

The point is I know the story. The falling in love part, but there is some sort of problem, then you overcome it and everything works out. Yeah, I got that. It's that everytime I walk out of the theater I'm thinking, "Well what now? They just go through life together in this world of love that they share?" That would make sense. That's what we want to think. That's why we hate Titanic, because you don't want Jack to freaking die. You want the typical-they will be okay and live together forever-ending. That's what everyone wants. It just ...it's weird. The entire relationship- the main part is the falling in love-beginning part. That's the exciting part. The only part that can be a movie. The next fifty years is what scares me.

Sitting in a coffee shop, looking at my charming I have one of those "oh so thoughtful, you got the iPod in your ears epic song playing as you sit in the car and watch other cars pass you and watch with those cars all the other lives that you will never know this could be a music video" moments. Love is a weird thing. Being with someone else. All my life, I am the main person. It's my movie and I am the narrator, the main person. Yeah there are other characters of course but they all are starring in their own movies too. So when you fall in love... your movie changes. Now you, the star of your own movie, are with someone who is also staring in their own movie. But your movies combine and you become a part of something that is bigger. There are two main people in the movie of love (cheesy, I know, I'm sorry)... but at the same time you will never and can never stop being the star of your own movie. Sick of the word movie yet? Let's go with story. It's like our ..selves, ourself is the camera sitting behind your eyes and you are now the new star of "The Hills." Your story never stops and you will never not be the main character. So being in love changes that without actually changing that. You become a team. You are now a part of something bigger, all the while still being the star of your own life. You make up a half of something else even though up 'til now you've always been ... something. I don't know. The shiz. You are yourself.
That never stops.

I'm not suppose to be talking about love here, I'm suppose to be talking about colors. Our personalities. Comparing the human self to a color. But I guess I would have to say that the color I choose for myself would be love. That is, if love were a color. And that color would not be pink or red or... freakin' magenta or something. My whole "world" is surrounded in "love" it makes my little spinny globe thing go 'round.

People are different colors. And colors are a big deal, you can do lots of fun things with colors but as a girl, I learned very early on that one of the "rules of being cute" is that colors MUST match. One person goes with another the
way one color matches another. (Someone very wise, once put it like that- simply put.) It's like the shape of people, the shape of a couple. That's their color. You know when you see a tiny little stick man walking with his... may i say... plump? wife. It just doesn't add up. Colors. We have to match up our personalities. You wouldn't wear red with orange. So if you're a red, don't even think about being with an orange- the color, not the fruit, of course.
There are some colors that are just so pretty they match with anything else. Those are the dangerous colors. They're hot. Like black. It's slimming, it goes with everything (except brown... does not everyone agree? think that... but everyone says about black "Oh black goes with everything." ....Anyway.)
Black can pick any color to be with (except for brown in my opinion, but it's totally up to black). Black can pick any color to be with. But if its smart, it will pick white. Because that is the ultimate combination. So yeah. Colors. We are different colors. So our story, the part that will be made into a movie is finding the color that will match you for the rest of your life. I guess I will just get back to you in fifty years and let you know how riding off into the sunset was and how the part after the epic "i will always love you babe tears are shed amazing kiss in the snow storm" scene and the color choice i made
went.

Currents

Tie me to the currents
That continuous, direct movement is what I crave
(I swear my destination of a moon won't change tonight)
'Cause right now I'm walking on a treadmill with no track

I'm running past the pages of this calendar
but these pages won't stop turning
All I can do is wait . . .
and watch the current I so badly wish to be a part of

Drop me in a pile of bored
I might as well splash around since I'll be here for awhile
Tying a shoelace only seems hard if you read the directions
Soon enough all the loose ends will tie themselves up

Buying a compass doesn't give you the direction you want
Just like wanting something doesn't make it happen sooner
I'll take a deep breath and count to ten
and hope the current pulls me under

hold my heart strings

"quit pulling on my heart strings!" she says to everyone.

a person made of love can only handle so many different angled emotions

my heart is made of glass and i only trust it on one other person's platter

quiet now, it's time to sit back, and forget about all other commotions

sit down and tell me all your troubles

my hearts big enough to hold your stresses

until i take too big of a sip of significance

only then is when my heart truly confesses

i'm only one tiny heart in this soul made up of love

i'll do what i can to balance both worlds of in-between

until i need you to hold my heart strings for me just so

i'll trade you my heart if you promise to save me from the things unforeseen.

notebook spirals

you were an autumn leaf in a pile that children play in,
but the wind brought you to me.
it was then i realized you weren't just a leaf, but my leaf
that would fit perfectly in my scrapbook of memories.

if i press you in the pages of my favorite book
will you mark the story of our lives?
i should've known the universe would cross our paths and dot our eyes
you opened the door for my heart and my heart is now smiling

our chemistry was like the sparks at a bonfire
and our electric fingers were the bumper cars of the amusement park
we're on the same page, same word
you be the vowel, i'll be the constanant

i'll be the notebook spirals to your diary and hold you together
if you'll be my flashlight when i hide under the covers
our record player is stuck on repeat
and we become the repeat sign on a musical staff

i'd pick you a flower from my garden of forever
but this garden is only made up of "he loves me" petals
splash your rainboots in the puddles of tomorrow
the weatherman can only predict what yesterday told him

lets break the hands of a clock to spend forever with each other
and moments will only be counted in gazes and whispers
our swing sets face the sunset colors against the canvas of tomorrow's promise
let's race to the ocean and be too afraid to jump in

the ink drops of our pen are mad at the hands of our love
they couldn't find words beautiful enough to express themselves
those three words cannot be expressed in enough languages
let's translate every version we can find and let our hearts memorize

this roller coaster make-believe fairytale lovestory of a ride won't ever end
our hearts may stop and our words might fail us
and they'll have to redefine the word genuine
because the world didn't know what it was until we met

through our rain-stained coffeshop window
the world just waits and watches
and we'll eat our cherriless sundaes and smile at the world
and only we'll know why


by amandalee.